Sun Dog Part 2

This was written a little while ago. Most of you will already know the outcome of this, but I wanted to share my thoughts, though it has passed by now.

Cosette in her crate at the airport

We have less than a week left in India, Cosette and I. I have sent her paperwork in, to get her export papers. These are the vital papers. Without them, Cosette will not be allowed to leave India, and I will still have to leave.
There is still a chance that she will be the “Sun dog” I originally thought she may be. I am terribly afraid of that to be honest. I’ve grown very attached to this little dog, and the thought of losing her is not a good one.
I’ve been running these past few days like a chicken with its head cut off, trying to get every little bit and piece that I need for Cosette’s paperwork, hoping I’ve not left anything out or done anything wrong.
Something, though it seems like the paperwork and everything is fine, I have moments, especially as we’re snuggling in the mornings upon waking, where I think, “Oh no, this may be the last week I have with her.” I might end up being forced to leave her in India for whatever reason. It’s not that there are valid problems, but you still never know. I will not be at ease until we are through customs in Chicago and really on our way home.
Even now, as I finish writing this, I am on the plane in Frankfurt Germany, waiting to start the last leg of the trip home. The purser just confirmed the Cosette is on board, and doing well, but I still have this fear that something will happen. Perhaps they’ve confirmed that there’s a dog in the hold, but it’s the other one which was actually loaded. There are two dogs supposed to be on this flight.
Maybe I’m being neurotic. One thing that calms my heart is the knowledge that there are a lot of people praying that this puppy will arrive safely in the States. I truly believe that is what got us through the airport in Bangalore when they did not want to let Cosette’s crate through. I’m just trying to keep trusting and not panic about things. Hoping now that I’ll have many years with my Sun Dog. 

Worth it All

I am finding as I get closer to the time we are leaving, that transporting a dog internationally is far more expensive than I expected. When I first found out the ticket price, I was thrilled. It was much lower that I would have ever guessed. It made me so happy that I could bring my puppy home, which I didn’t think I could do.
But now, everything is adding up, the little bits and pieces that I didn’t realize would be there. Aiyoo...definitely wasn’t expecting that.

In a way though, I am glad that I did not know what the price would end up being. It is still well within my means to afford it, but if I had been informed of the total before starting, there is a chance that I would not have gone through with the plan to bring Cosette home. And I believe I would have ended up regretting that my whole life.
I’m guessing that if you don’t like animals, you’re probably not reading this blog, so I likely do not have to worry too much about being judged for this. Just in case though, I know she is a dog. I realize that in general, spending a large amount of money on a dog is foolish. I think the most my family has ever paid for a dog was about $20. Usually we end up getting free dogs.
However, something I have been learning lately, is to do things because you want to. To not let money stand in the way of it, but look ahead in order to make your choices. When you make a choice, think ‘will I regret deciding this way?’ And if the answer is yes, you will regret it, then decide the other way, and let nothing stand in your way. Money especially.

Not sure why this one ended up upside down, but blogger won't let me rotate it at all. Oh well...Cosette looks adorable :~)

I am not in any way saying that you should throw your money away on a lot of nonsense. For instance, I would have loved to buy a horse when I was working at a Friesian farm. There was one for sale that I really liked, but when I thought about spending $7,500 on a ten year old, green-broke, frequently lame horse, I knew that it was not a wise choice. I thought ahead, and knew that if I did not buy him, I would be a bit disappointed, but I would not regret it. It would not be something that continued to bother me my whole life.
But that is the case with bringing Cosette home. Granted, it is nowhere near the same amount of money as buying a Friesian. But it is more than I ever thought I would spend on a dog. Thinking about it though, I know for sure that if I did not bring her home, I would regret it completely. She has some major attachment issues. Even if I just step outside the house for a couple of minutes, she freaks out, howling and whining, then jumps on me the moment I return to her as though she thought I would never come back again. It would be unfair for me to leave her now.
And honestly, this puppy is well worth it. She came into my life at just the time that I most needed her. It was unexpected, though I cannot at all say she was unwanted. She has been the brightness for me during several very dark days. She was a gift from God, I truly believe that, funnily enough coming right around my “new birthday”, the day the dorm decided to choose as my birthday this year. She has made such a difference in my life in just the few months I have had her, and I can’t just dump her now.
In a disposable society and a disposable world, there are some things that need to be held onto, even if it’s not that easy. 

Best Dog in the World

I had someone teasing me the other day, because I was telling them that Cosette is the best and cutest dog in the world. They assumed that Cosette was the first dog I have had because of the way I was talking about her. I told him that I have had dogs since I can remember. My first dog was Stukey. She was only a year younger than me, and we got her when she was just a puppy, so I don’t remember any time before her. Stukey was an amazing dog. We could use her as a pillow, take toys from her without fear of her snapping at us, hold dog biscuits in our mouths and let her take them, etc. Didn’t matter what we did with that dog, we were safe.

We’ve had other dogs over the years. Tippy, Shasta, Kita, Alathea. Then there were my Grampa’s dogs that I grew up with; Duke, Zena, and Shadow. I have known some spectacular dogs.

But Cosette is the first dog that has been my dog alone. She is the first dog that has been my responsibility. She is the one that I rescued, and the one that I have spent time with, just watching her breathe, marveling at the way she has grown in the last 2 months, and feeling how different it is to hold her now than when I first found her. All of the other dogs have been shared responsibility.

So yeah, I am a little biased...my puppy is a little psycho child sometimes. She likes to take my belongings and run through the house, hiding under the bed (though she’s getting a little big for that), and pretending that she has no idea that she is being naughty. But that look in her eyes tells me that she knows. She loves to run around, acting like she doesn’t know what, “Cosette, come.” means. But then she snuggles up next to me, cuddling as close as she can, and I can’t really remember how naughty she has been. I just remember how much I love her, and how happy I am that she came into my life.

So yeah, she is the best dog in the world. But I’d probably be the only person who says that. 

Passstarboard...wait...no...Passport! Yeah...that's the one.

Went to get my puppy her last shots today. So much paperwork...Aiyoo...But at the end of it all, we have her "passport". It's really just a cute way of doing her health paperwork, and shot record and whatnot. Still plenty to do as far as paperwork goes, but she is getting closer. So exciting! 

Oh, by the way, have you ever seen the needle they use to microchip a dog? I thought we were going whale hunting when she pulled that harpoon out of the package. Flipping heck...
By the bye...we could use some prayer about the microchip thing. What is supposed to happen when a dog is microchipped is that the vet will then read the chip to be certain that the number on the card matches the number on the chip. But the vet doesn't have a reader that works. So I am going to try to find a kennel club or something that would have a working reader. That was the suggestion the vet gave. Otherwise, I'll just be praying that we got an accurate set.

Cosette says, "C'mon Mom, let's just go to the States already. No more needles."

I won't be completely relaxed about all of this until Cosette is actually in the States. There are so many things that could go wrong. But each step closer makes me have more hope that it will actually work. After seeing how Cosette acted when I left her with Carla for very short times, I don't know how she'd react if I left her in the India. And after teaching her to be the kind of dog she is, it would be entirely unfair to her. So, I'm praying, and doing all that I can to get this crazy little pup to the States. 

Hug a warm puppy

Puppy therapy is something that happens with me a lot. I can be having a completely sucky day, and then I go to get Cosette so we can go home, and something happens when I am with her, and nothing is quite so bad once I have her with me. I'd choose a warm puppy over a psychiatrist any day.
I never realized how much I missed having a dog around until I had Cosette. It was just something I blocked out of my mind I guess. But now she gives me something to look forward to at the end of the day. From her mad  rampages through my house when she gets excited, to snuggling with her when we're both about to fall asleep, to waking up to her asking for a belly rub, she makes me smile. Especially now, as I have been struggling with stuff a lot, she makes my days so much brighter. She showed up at the ideal time, and I am so grateful to have her.

Unwanted

When I told people where Cosette came from, anyone who knows the area told me that there are puppies there frequently. There are people there who breed puppies to sell. They sell any that they can, and when the remaining puppies are too old to sell, they boot them out onto the street, where they either fend for themselves or die.

Cosette loves being an inside puppy. She's gotten pretty convinced that she'll die if she goes back out on the street.

I don’t get why or how someone would do this. Why would you dump a perfectly good puppy just because you’ve not sold it? How could you turn away such a tiny, sweet thing, knowing that it will likely die? I don’t understand it. I guess when one sees the puppies as a nuisance and a money maker (or money eater if it does not sell), it would be easy. No different than me throwing away some scraps of wire that didn’t turn into the necklace I wanted them to turn into.

It’s easy to say it is an Indian thing, or a third world thing, since I’ve seen stuff like this in Brazil and whatnot too. But it’s really a human thing. We’re so into throwing away what doesn’t work for us. Be it an animal that isn’t bringing in the money we expected, or a relationship, or even babies and the elderly. If it doesn’t give us anything, we don’t want it. How pathetic is it that our society has become like this?

It makes me sad to see people ridding their lives of things which could teach them so much. 

Not sure how someone could look at that face and throw her away. People are and will remain a mystery to me. 

Terrible

Sunday, Sept 15, I had the worst experience I have had since I found Cosette. Thank God, it turned out much better than it could have.

It was about 9 pm, and we went out for a run. We often do later at night, and Cosette usually does not have to wear her collar at those times, because she hates it. For those of you who know me well, you know that this shows how much I love this little puppy. I do not go running…I hate running…But she likes it, so I go :~) And I enjoy running with Cosette.

Anyway, we were running, and a motorcycle came around the corner. I tried to get Cosette to get to the side, away from it, but this “monster” bearing down on her scared her, and she just scurried, not thinking about where she was going. The driver did not try to swerve or slow, he simply kept coming. He came close to hitting me even.

All I could see was the headlight of the motorcycle, Cosette was too little to see in the dark. I heard a yelp, and she went tumbling away from the motorcycle. I have seen plenty of animals that have been hit by cars, I know what they look like when the hit is fatal. They writhe, trying to get up and run away, but all that they can do is twist on the ground, because their back has been broken. The terror and the pain is awful to see. Cosette looked like she was doing this, and I did not know what to do. Everything happened so fast. I can’t even describe how I felt. It was horrible. To think I was watching my puppy die.

Finally, Cosette leapt to her feet, and scurried up the road toward home. I ran after her (and yelled at the driver a bit…called him a stupid idiot…). Cosette stopped when she realized it was just me and not the motorcycle behind her. She was holding her front left leg tight to her chest. It was the only visible sign that anything had happened, but my biggest fear was internal injuries. I know that often, with things like this, there is damage that you can’t see, and it’s something that can’t be fixed. I took her to the house, and felt her all over to check for damage. Nothing seemed injured, and she didn’t act in pain when I touched anything but her shoulder.

I sat on the couch and held Cosette for a while, and cried, knowing how bad things could have been. Then she wanted to sleep. She couldn’t quite get comfortable because of her leg, so she would lay one way for a few seconds before shifting to another position. We laid on the couch for some time as she tried to sleep. I wanted to do something for her, but there wasn’t anything to be done other than waiting. I was already planning to take her to the vet the next morning for her rabies shot, so I figured I’d have her checked then.

Before we went to bed, Cosette was starting to put some weight on her leg. By morning, she was able to run around, with only the slightest limp. Like my Mom said, puppies are resilient. Honestly, I think it was a miracle. She could have been dead so easily, but by the time that I took her to the vet in the morning, she was doing so well that I did not even have to have her checked. Which was just as well since there was a bit of a language barrier that would have made it a bit tough.

She’s perfectly fine now. No sign of a limp. Runs around like a mad thing. Still a little jumpy when she hears a motorbike coming up the road, but who can blame her? I thank God for protecting her. That moment when I thought she was dying was the worst moment I have had in a long time. So thankful that she is ok. And I think she is too. 

Like a Child

I was sitting in the yard, talking with my friend Joy, as we watched “our kids” running and playing together. Her kid was actually a child, Joy’s 3 year old daughter Meryn. Mine of course was Cosette.

We talked about our girls, and about life in general, our conversation occasionally punctuated by admonitions to Cosette and Meryn to stay away from the horses’ back ends, or comments that maybe it was time to calm a little. We discussed the hassles of raising a child (or a puppy) in India, and how neurotic Moms can be sometimes. I told about things I’ve learned about Cosette (just the night before, I let her sleep for 3 hours just before bed, which resulted in her not being ready for bed, and running around like a crazy child while I tried to sleep). It made us both chuckle, because really, anyone who would have heard us talking and not known the context would likely have thought we were both talking about human children.

I know Cosette is a puppy, not a baby…I’m not quite a crazy dog lady yet :~) But I also know that she has a lot of similarities to a child, whether in the care she needs, or the discipline, or just basic things. She needs love and attention, she needs to be taught, and most of all, she needs to know she can trust me, and I will not abandon or abuse her. I’m actually learning a lot about small children from her. She is the first puppy that has actually been mine. The first pet at all that has completely depended on me, and the first one I’ve not been able to just ask my parents to care for if I’m going to be busy. I have to work out what to do with her to be sure she is well cared for. I have to get her the necessary shots, and be sure that she is healthy. It is a lot of work, but well worth it. Especially at moments like this, when she is asleep in my arms while I type (She is often there when I type).

Life was a lot easier without a puppy, but it is a lot more pleasant with her. 

Compassion

When Cosette goes to work with me, she spends a lot of her time at the Glenrock dorm, the dorm where the ponies are kept. It’s the part of the school where I spend most of my time. I was a little concerned about how she would take to the boys. A nervous little puppy with a dorm full of 13 year old boys, and a 3 year old girl. It could have posed a huge problem.

It’s funny then, that just a few days before I found Cosette, that I did a dorm devo for the boys about compassion. It wasn’t a lecture about them needing compassion, it was more about the fact that I have seen how compassionate they are, and I wanted to show them how biblical their attitude toward the animals was. One of the main verses I used was Proverbs 12:10:

A righteous man cares for the needs of his animal, but the kindest acts of the wicked are cruel.

These boys care for the animals so well. The first words I hear from them each day at the school are, “Where’s Cosette?” or “How’s Cosette?” They have Cosette, and the horses, and the cat, and they love them all. I always tease them that they don’t miss me when I am not there, just only miss my puppy.

I go down after school finishes to pick up Cosette who spends a lot of time in the afternoons in the feed shed at the dorm, and there’s usually at least one boy in petting her. If it is cold, Cosette is often tucked into the jacket of one of the boys so that she can stay warm. Or one of the boys will have fashioned a little bandana for her from some scrap cloth that was in the shed. They all know she is my puppy, but they take care of her as though she was theirs. It is really neat to see these young boys having such compassion on a little puppy, and taking care of her even though she isn’t theirs.

I do wonder what the dorm would have looked like this year without all of the animals. They seem to bring out the best in the boys. Especially the puppy and kitten. Maybe it is the thing of taking care of baby animals, I don’t know. And baby animals who are so happy to see them.

The boys take care of the animals, and in a way, I feel like the animals take care of them too. There’s something about an animal that can make you forget that you’re living away from home, and away from your family. They can brighten any day, no matter how terrible it has been. Seeing the joy that radiates from an animal who is excited to see you is a feeling that cannot be replicated by anything else. Therapy in its most raw form. 

Spoiled

Most puppies I have known have been fairly spoiled from the time they were born; born with a silver spoon in their mouths, so to speak. First they have the attention of their Mom, and siblings as playmates. Their Mom is fed well, meaning they get good nutrition from the start. Fed proper puppy food from the time they’re supposed to be fed solid food, trained, played with, loved.

But then there are those who are born on the street, or born in a little indian puppy mill where they are thrown out on the street if they aren’t sold quickly enough. They try to fend for themselves, but puppies weren’t made to be alone, and there’s a good chance that most of these pups won’t make it.

Every once in a while though, there is a puppy who is found by someone who cares enough to make a difference in its life. Someone who isn’t willing to walk by and let that puppy die.

That is what happened with Cosette, and it has been fun to see how she has changed in the last week. Less than a week, really.

When I first found Cosette, she was the calmest little  puppy I had seen. Too scared and starving to play or be silly. The way she moved had a very nervous edge to it. She wanted to be friendly, but she was shy. The first time I attempted to approach Cosette, she reminded me of my old dog Tippy when we first found her. Tippy was a puppy too when she showed up at our house the day after Christmas one year. She had been abused and was half dead.

Cosette had the same look in her eyes that Tippy often had; a look of, “I want to love you, but please don’t hurt me.”

She scarfed down any food she was given as though she thought it would be stolen if she waited at all. When I gave her a bath in the evening, she stood on the edge of the bucket, trying to get out, but did not fight with me at all. When I wrapped her in a towel, she did not try to get out of the towel until I unwrapped it, even when she tipped over on her side. She was resigned to whatever happened to her. She acted more like an old dog who has seen too much to care than a puppy who was just starting life.

She has changed so quickly though. She has turned into a proper puppy. She eats when she wants to, she leaves the food she doesn’t need, she has settled into a normal eating pattern. She knows what she wants, and makes her desires known. For example, when she thinks it is bedtime, she runs into the bedroom and stands up against the bed, looking at me until I lift her up onto the bed. She chases me through the house, grabbing my trouser legs in her teeth to get me to play. She runs around the house, hiding from me, but comes running, with a huge puppy grin when I call her to come.

Cosette climbs on my lap, and chews on my fingers, ignoring the toys I try to get her to chew on. She runs up to people while we’re out walking, saying hi to them before running back to me. With her endearing personality, everyone who has met this goofy little puppy has liked her. She plays like crazy until she gets tired, at which point, she flops down, falling fast asleep as only a puppy can.

As only a puppy can…she is turning into a proper puppy and it is fun to watch. 

Thank you!

Cosette says “Thank you Grama, for bringing the tennis balls! You’re the best Grama ever!!!”

 

She doesn’t seem to care about the fact that the tennis balls are almost the size of her head. She still has a lot of fun with them. Made her this one with strips of denim through it, and when I can get her to stop chewing on my hands, she likes it :~) She also has fun chasing a plain tennis ball through the house, and somehow manages to pick it up and carry it. She has a huge mouth for such a little thing. She doesn’t bring it back to me yet though. 

The one and only

You read books about people and their wonderful dogs, and it’s always like, “I’ve never had a dog like this before, and I never will again. There is no dog in the world like this one.”

This is true to a point. There are no two dogs that are alike. But there have been massive similarities in the 3 dogs that I have connected very closely with over the years.

The first was my dog Tippy. She came to us a starving, abused puppy that we did not think would survive. Carla and I babied that dog, doing our best to help her survive. We took her out for walks, and ended up carrying her half the time when she was too weak to walk any farther. Her whole life, Tippy had a fear of men, and a bit of an aversion to large groups of people (unless they had food she could beg…). But from the time she was a puppy, she attached herself to Carla and me. She went from being a starving pup, who could hardly stand up, to a pup that was full of life, who would run in the snow with us, pulling our gloves off and running away, the happy look on her face telling us to chase her. She would run to my grandparents’ house any time Carla and I were gone, in the hopes that we were there. She’d track me through the woods when I was riding, and find me even if I was half a mile from home. We were hers, and continued to be hers for the whole of her life.

The next dog like that was Shadow. Technically, not my dog. He is my Grandparents’ dog, but Grampa always says that I am Shadow’s girl. From the moment we met, we have been close. I went to the shelter with Grama and Grampa to choose a dog, and I was the first person to take him for a walk. Then we spent the hour or so long ride together in the backseat. He hadn’t been abused or neglected, but had been given to the shelter by his family when he was still fairly young. He just wanted a buddy. The first time I went to visit after they adopted him, he ran into the house, took one look at me, and jumped on the couch beside me. He wasn’t allowed on the couch, and had not tried to get on there before, but was just too excited to see me. I took him to obedience classes, and showed him in 4-H, which he thought was a big game. He’s getting old, and going for long walks hurts his legs, but he still wants desperately to go for long walks when I go for a visit. And I can’t tell him no. We go for walks, and he bounces around again like he is a puppy. Grama and Grampa always tell me that if my Mom comes over for a visit and I am not there, Shadow comes to say hi, but then wanders around, looking for me, thinking that I am supposed to be there too. It’s hard leaving a dog like that as you’re not able to explain to them why you have to leave. And you can’t communicate with them when you’re away. I miss that boy.

And then there is Cosette. Less than a week, and she has already decided that I am hers. When she sleeps, she really wants to be touching me somehow, even if she is only lying next to me with her head against my leg. She’ll halfway wake up every once in a while, and shift, just so that she is touching me, then fall back asleep. It’s like she is reassuring herself that I am here. She is amazing when I have to leave her tied while I’m working, or leave her at home alone, but when I come back, she jumps around, so excited to have me back. She loves to visit with other people, but always turns back to me, even while she’s playing. She’ll run over to me, get a pat, and go back to whoever she is playing with. She seems to like to know that I am there.

I guess that each of these dogs needed someone, and I happened to be around to be that person. It isn’t anything special about me, it’s just being in the right place at the right time, and being willing.  I haven’t made a huge effort to be a favourite of these dogs. I just treated them the way I typically treat dogs, and they seem to need that. And who knows…Maybe I needed them too. 

A Fortuitous Meeting

Riding to town. One and a half hours bareback, ponying another horse. My butt was sore, my mind was distracted. I almost rode by her, distracted as I was. How am I supposed to notice each starving/wounded/neglected/abused/insert negative word here dog in Ooty? A town where animals are bred indiscriminately, and the young are cast off on their own if they aren't sold quickly enough. A town where any time you walk around, you are likely to see some animal in dire need of a lot of TLC. My heart has not grown hard to it, but I have come to grips with the fact that I cannot do anything for most of them.

For some reason though, this little puppy caught my attention. Small enough that she should not have been on her own, scavenging along the road, trying to find food. She was skin and bones, and looked like one of the nearby crows could easily carry her away. Though I doubt they would have bothered with a little pile of bones.

Against my somewhat better judgment (I ignore that a lot…) I slid off of Shadow, left him and Herc to graze at the side of the road, and made my attempt to catch the dog.

She came up shyly, head down, but tail wagging. It was apparent that she wanted to be friends, but was just a little too nervous. It didn’t take too much coaxing (fortunately, because I was terrified someone would come up and say I was stealing their puppy) to get her close enough to touch my fingers, then close enough that I could pick her up.

She was remarkably calm as I zipped her into my coat and, with the help of a wall, climbed back on Shadow. For the short ride that remained, she snuggled down, happy to be somewhere warm. Every once in a while, her little nose would pop out of my jacket, she would look around a bit, and then she’d pull her head back in. She spent a lot of time looking up at me, as though trying to figure out just what was happening.

After confirming that my new puppy was a girl, I decided to name her Cosette. It just fits her. She is beautiful and delicate, and has a wonderfully sweet and loving nature.  

This blog will follow my time with my dear Cosette. Just a couple of days with her, and I am smitten. She runs toward me with her face lit up in a puppy smile, and my heart melts. Hopefully I can convey some of her special personality to you.

Sun Dog

What is a sundog? Have you ever looked up into the sky, and there is a patch of rainbow light hanging in the sky? It looks like a short, fat rainbow in the midst of everything, but it isn’t after a rain. That is a sundog. A thing of such beauty, but fleeting. Only there for a short time, depending on atmospheric conditions. You can take pictures of them when they appear, but a photo never captures what you want to capture. It might show a bit of the colour, but you can never capture the complete splendour of the sun dog.

This is a good picture of what I am dealing with at the moment. I have my own “Sun dog” in the form of a tiny, half-starved Pi dog (an indian street dog). She is adorable, but that isn’t where the beauty part comes in. The beauty is her amazing personality, and her willingness to love in spite of the rough start she has had. The word fleeting describes our relationship as well. I am only in India until December, and then I have to leave. I’m not sure how I’ll deal with that. I take so many pictures of my sweet Cosette, but they do not capture her. Oh, they are super cute, but they don’t actually show her personality. Looking at pictures of her is not the same as having her asleep on my lap (Where she is at the moment), or seeing her running toward me, so excited to see me. It isn't the same as watching tv with her, and having her wake just a little, to make sure she is still cuddled into me enough, before falling back asleep. Pictures cannot capture the moments with my little sun dog. Even the moments when she is difficult and does not want to let me sleep are sweet because of who she is.